You girls got scooters for Christmas and earlier in the day, I had watched you race fearlessly down a hill on them. I was filled with two feelings; one that I wanted you both to grab the danger that is being a small person and riding a fast moving thing and stare it down and two that I did not want you to fall (I also did give thought to how upset B gets if her dress gets messy). I had to work hard to keep my usual warning of "careful!" from jumping out.
Later, while staring at that distant light, which on a foggy night looks much like a little moon, I thought about how I have those conflicting hopes and thoughts about a lot of parts of your lives. I hope that you know the feeling of playing on a winning team but that you also have many lazy afternoons in your future, not to be filled up with endless obligations. I hope that you can walk confidently alone across a crowded cafeteria with your head held high but that you also know the feeling of your fingers intertwined with a boy as he walks with you down the sidewalk. I hope that you break through any glass ceiling you may encounter and find yourself with as much success as you work for but I long for you to also know the contented quiet of a nursery where the moon lights the cheeks of the newborn sleeping in your arms.
I wish we could have all the best of all the worlds. But there is not time nor opportunity. There have been many times I have had to close the door on one dream, to take a chance on another. There is little guiding these decisions, so the best advice I have is to trust yourself. Be content with the fact that you cannot, in fact, have it all. But you can get pretty close. I may never know what life would have looked like if I spent my 20's climbing a corporate ladder, traveling remote destinations or getting advanced degrees. But I do know that starting every morning, two bright little faces accompany me on my day and focusing on what is best for you is the message I trust.