Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Choosing to be happy

(a mini rant)

Being a mom is hard. You suddenly have a little, tiny person who is completely reliant on you for almost their every need. You go from being your own person with your own agenda, to a slave to baby’s schedule. You fight sickness and fussiness, whining and tantrums. You are rewarded with snuggles and kisses, and good naps and dinners eaten in full. It is really easy to get sucked into “the vent” that comes along with being a mom.

I see it all the time, especially in social media where moms use it as an outlet to complain about how hard they have it, or how much their child does not sleep/eat/stop teething/whining/crying/fussing. And yes, we all have those days. But I make it a point to focus on the good. This is, after all, a job/lifestyle/choice that I willingly and happily made. Every day, I look forward to nap time and bed time, just like every other mom. But because I know that break is coming, I try to make the best of the time in-between. If you are fussy, we go outside or to the park. If you won’t eat, I long ago stopped trying to fight you on that and I let you down from your chair. If you won’t nap, we snuggle on the couch. I try to remember that you are only this little for such a fleeting amount of time. Time will sneak up on us and you will be driving down the driveway for college and I want to look back and know I appreciated those little moments, even the fussy ones, the best way I could.

Some things that help me are to wake up expecting the absolute worst. It sounds really depressing, but having the right expectations has been the turning point for me. If we have a great day full of laughing and sleeping and eating and pooping, I am pleasantly surprised. If we have a day full of feet stomping, throwing food, head bonks and no sleep, it is what I expected would probably happen.

I will admit “the vent” bothers me. Some mothers do it on whatever social outlet they can get their hands on. The solution to make motherhood easier is simply to choose to make it easier. Choose to be happy. Change your expectations. Make yourself find a way to recharge. Start taking photos (if you don’t already). I find picture taking to be a great way to focus on the small, beautiful moments and discoveries. I fear these moms may look back with regret with all the time they spend complaining about, not enjoying, the gift that is motherhood. No one has it easy. But no one said it would be easy.

Two pretties of you:


  1. I'm one of your newer followers, and when I read the first paragraph of this post, I thought "oh no, this mom is going to vent about being a 'slave' to her child".....I read on and I was pleasantly surprised :)
    Thanks for writing this! It was refreshing, and I agree with you wholeheartedly (about moms who "vent" AND about how much we should cherish this time with our little ones!
    For me, having a baby was a life decision....not a job or a requirement. She's not just an accessory, but she's an integral part of my life. I wouldn't have it any other way :)

  2. Love the pictures of Elle! I also hate moms who constantly vent. I looove my time with Delia...even on the days when nap time seems like it's a century away. It is hard, but SO worth it!

  3. word to your hobby lobby.
    this is all so true. and elle is edible per uge.

  4. When I started reading I thought it would be another vent about motherhood, but I was pleasantly surprised! Everyone has those days, there's no doubt motherhood is hard, but it's definitely better to get lost in the good than to get bogged down in the hard. Great post!

  5. Breathtaking photos of your beautiful little one as always! And, I totally agree.