This baby does have a mama...

All the pictures I take are of you. You and Reilly. You and dad. You and grandmom. There are very few pictures of you and me. I know I love looking at pictures of my mom & I when I was little so I was determined to get some today.

So there you are with your cute new Etsy headband, looking well, not too thrilled to be hanging out with me :(

Acutally I believe you were trying to think of a way to eat the camera. If you could just eat Reilly's ears and the camera, your life goals would be accomplished.

Anyway, I look WAY too excited but here we are:

Your Sleeping Quarters & Something New

I realized a few weeks ago that I had never taken a good photo of your crib. You love your crib. After you have just woken up from a nap, you play around in there and because pretty light comes in the windows it is a good place for pictures too.

Your grandmother made pretty much all the bedding from scratch, she is one very talented lady.

Your dad & I could not find anything we liked bedding wise so I mixed and matched some inspiration photos and viola! Beautiful baby bed :)

So that is where you spend most of your time, with all your sleeping you have been doing.

For readers: I usually get compliments on two things with Elle: Her cheeks & her clothes. So I got the cheeks covered with the photos but I thought it would be fun to showcase some of her cutest outfits every once in awhile and call it "Elle Style" (sort of a stab at the stupid people who ask me if I named my daughter after a fashion magazine- which I did not!).

So something new to look forward to!

Jailbird in Bed

Whenever I am getting ready for the day and you are up, I put you on our bed under the ceiling fan and you watch it spin and smile. Such a sweet little jailbird (that is what your dad calls you when you wear this suit).

Wading Pool in the City

Today we went to the City to the wading pool with your grandmom. The water was pretty cold, so I thought you would hate it.

But you loved it!

You stomped and stomped till you got tired and needed a mom snuggle.

And then you passed out in your stroller. With trusty sophie.

Outside

We spend most of the day after I get home outside. I was excited because today was overcast so I thought I could get some good photos of you without the sun glaring at us. But you were not in a photo mood (read: you would not look at me). So I took some pictures of some flowers instead (see: me sticking my tongue out at you).

When I came back up the driveway, you were having a total love session with Reilly. I think she is your favorite form of entertainment.

So happy today

Today was a good day for us both. I got to come home for two hours in the middle of the day while your dad went to the dentist.

We snuggled on the bed in the late morning sun and I felt like I was playing hookie.

When I got home, we headed out to your blanket under the tree. I laid in the sun and you sat in the shade






















































Then it was time for bouncing but it was too hot even in the shade so you bounced on the deck.


























Tonight for some reason you fought your nap so we did bath, bottle and an early bed time. Now you are fussing in your crib. I hate it when you fuss. Makes this mama sad. Sleep well little one.

A weird day

It has been chilly in the shade and warm in the sun.

You bounced outside in the shade but turned into an icicle so I bundled you up in your cute little sweater.

























This photo was entered in the Shutter Love Tuesday contest, see other entries here:

Motherhood is hard (kinda of)

A first time mom really never knows what to expect. When you were born, it was hard to have a little person who was totally dependent on me. I was careful not to read too many books and I mostly followed my instincts and your cues. Somethings did not work out. Like breastfeeding. I tried for 6 weeks. You were eating about every 45 minutes and I was not producing enough milk. I tried everything from teas, pills, 17 bowls of oatmeal a day and 47 gallons of water. Nothing worked. At your 6 week appointment, you had lost weight. I cried right there in the office, feeling like such a failure. For the next month I pumped and supplemented with formula and everyone was happy. I was pumping every two hours and getting maybe two ounces for the whole day. So I stopped that as well and you continued to thrive, so we were good. That has been our biggest issue.

I did not get any baby blues. You did not get colic. Everything else (despite those couple of days at 5 1/2 months were you had to learn how to sleep in your crib and you cried a lot) has been easy. I love being with you. Maybe it is because I have a short commute and good work schedule, arriving home at 2:45pm so I have lots of time with you, but I am not with you full time so I do not tire of you. Or because your dad is really helpful. Or because we are doing well financially. Or I am just really low key. I am not sure, but sometimes I feel like this whole motherhood thing should be harder, but it is not. It is, well, lovely really. (I am sure the baby gods will now turn you into a really difficult child for writing that.)

Of course our lives are different and in some ways harder. But the rest of it, all the good stuff, just completely overshadows the tough stuff. I read a lot of other blogs and I think maybe I am the weird one. Maybe I am too puppies and rainbows and look at my pretty baby. But that is just how it is for us. (I mean you are one hell of a pretty baby).

So on to more important matters. Your dad let me sleep in today and when I woke up we had a little photo session but the light was weird (I use natural light) because it was sort of cloudy so I had to keep adjusting my settings. You were really sick of me by the end of it. You did something slightly mean.

You flipped me off.

So I hope our journey stays as easy as has been. I just love being your mama. But please, stopping flipping me the bird. It makes me feel a little sad inside. I love you pretty bear.

New Toy!

Your dad & I always said that when we were parents we were never going to have tons of bright, colorful toys. We were going to have trendy wooden ones that matched our decor. Well, you my dear, love to jump. Starting a few weeks ago, whenever we were holding you, you would try to jump out of our arms. So we would sit and let you jump on our laps but you are getting very heavy and this made us very tired.

So we caved. We could not find anything to help you jump that was not ridiculously hideous. This thing we bought is actually the least hideous one. It plays music and you can spin in it and it is about as big as a Miata. But you love it. This afternoon I brought you out into the warm, summer air and you jumped while the sun peeked through the trees.

You love it out there. (Yes, you have to stand on a pillow because your mother is a midge.)

You even stopped jumping long enough for me to get a close up.

Then you stuck your tongue out at me and kept jumping.

A good Wednesday.

Summer weekend under the tree

Saturday I was really sick. I napped when you napped and when you woke, we headed out to the quilt on the lawn. I snuck around the tree to capture you sitting out there. You look so grown up, just watching the cars drive by.

You spied me sneaking around the tree and gave me the same look you always do when you see the camera...

That was all a lot of work for my sick self so I laid next to you on the quilt and you played with all your bright, colorful toys.

You got bored of those and wiggled closer for a snuggle.

So I pulled you into my lap and we both examined my black toenails. Your dad loves this color, I worry it makes me look 12.

I was not a very fun mom this weekend. But you did not seem to catch this beast so I am happy. You still laughed and giggled and charmed the hell out of me. I hate Sundays because it means I have to leave you while I go to work.

This morning...

You were feeling quite photogenic this morning, so I did not let the moment pass us by.

We are going through a heat wave here and your dad & I have been directing all the cold air into your room. This of course meant your dad & I slept in the desert of a bedroom and if you were to take my photo right now, I would look like a Haggrid from Harry Potter, only slightly more midget size. This mama of yours also has a cold and I am not trying to give it to you but you insist on being so cute, I am finding it hard not to kiss you.

This one is from about a week ago when we took the train to the City and I keep meaning to share it. My, those are some big cheeks you have. You can thank your dad for those.

To the Beach!

Your dad & I headed to the beach with you today. You went once, when we were in San Diego but it was fiercely windy and if I can remember correctly you Hated it (capital H necessary).

This was our set up.

You really liked watching Reilly swim in and out of the water for sticks. Eventually, she got tired of sticks and began bringing whole logs ashore.

You stood with your baby toes in the wet sand with dad.

You kept trying to eat your foot except it looked like this and I knew you would regret it so I would not let you nom it.

You tried to get your dad's mouth, a favorite game. You thought it was so funny.

And then it wasn't funny anymore.

So we headed out of there. You slept the whole way home and your dad & I were slightly pink, slightly sandy but totally happy.

Train Ride

We decided to take the train to the City. What we forgot about trains is that they are not very loud places, therefore not the best place to take a 6 month old who has just discovered how to get her whine on in a major way (that would be you, whiney whinerson).

It was a constant struggle to keep you entertained. Our companion Sophie the Giraffe was a hit for the first 30 minutes.

Then you got so mad at Sophie that we had to hide her under the burp cloth so you did not gobble her up in one bite.

So we had to find new things to play with, like this bottle that you nomed for five seconds.

So I fed you some food.

And made you a train bed. But don't be fooled, everyone could hear you screeching under that very lightweight blanket. You screeched like a starred ghost banshee and I was worried the conductor was going to toss you into the river.

You did not sleep well so when we got the hotel, we got you into your pjs and right into bed.

While you were sleeping, I collapsed into the soft white pillows and thought about how different my life is now that you are in it. I used to have these little parcels of happiness that I would open in my mind when things were hard. In these parcels were perfect memories: snowboarding alone down a hill listening to Third Eye Blind, snuggling on the winter-cold Pacific Northwest beach with your dad when we were young, hot and sticky kisses in Australia my sophomore year of college. Those memories seem distant.

Now I have one parcel. One that delivers a daily dose of happiness, when that warm feeling buzzes up though your belly and through your smile, I have that every day now. When you have just woken up from your nap and I pull you up to me and you are tired and heavy, the happiness your little being produces could crush me. You are the heaviest weight. The best weight. The best gift. The parcel I can open up again and again for the rest of my life. Even when you are screeching on the train, or fighting naps or spitting up on my 5th outfit, it is all worth it. Good work little parcel.

Photo Session Part Two

Today we spent the day at the mall. Your dad & I needed some new clothes. You are always dressed to the nines and we were looking like a couple of homeless bums who stole a beautiful baby. Because of the holiday weekend, every one and their brother were milling around the stores, making it impossible to push the stroller. It was loud and bright and you did not nap well.

When we got home, you were a very sad little bear. I tried to put you down but you cried and cried despite my chest rubbing and shushing. I finally just scooped you up and rocked you. You are 6 months old today and your body now stretches all the way across my arms. You quickly fell asleep. You just needed your mommy medicine.

Photo Session Part One

I usually just plop you in the yard and dance around with my camera making really annoying sounds trying to get you to look at me but this time, we did a mini photo session:

The rest to come tomorrow!